Nobody has time for almost anything anymore, schedules are “full,” and we crave time. This reminds me of the book “Momo.”

Having time can be wealth or poverty. Being rich is different from being greedy. Being rich is having something to share and distribute; the greedy only accumulate; the means have become an end. They kill by starvation.

Summer is here, offering sun, beach, and mountains—free time without outside pressure. Time to manage different goals: reading, cultural visits, hiking… but also time for #friendship: cultivating it, discovering it, savoring it. Long breakfasts with family, afternoons chatting with friends, board games at dusk, or walks on the beach, hand in hand, by the light of the full moon.

There are solitudes desired so that the pieces of the personal puzzle can fall into place, and we can look at each other with #mercy and #tenderness. But there are also painful #solitudes that we must heal by looking within ourselves with the gaze of love. This summer, don’t accumulate likes, accumulate #presences, accumulate “hangouts.” Don’t be a tourist in anyone’s life, be a shared melody.

Time for friends, but if you don’t have any, the rocky road begins: approach, start a conversation, invite people for a beer, open your home, and your smile. A smile is a language everyone understands. In my book “The Self and Its Metaphors,” when I talk about friendship, I begin by saying: “Making friends is tiring; having friends is relaxing.” And today I would add, “Not having them is killing.”

The individualism that advances like fog has many precedents: fear, insecurity, low self-esteem, or narcissism, but it steals your breath, suffocating you without permission.

The self is intimacy in its purest form; the ego is disconnection, the inner blackout without solace. Disconnection from myself and from the outside world. No one can last long without light and help.

Summer has arrived, and people shine with the sunlight and smile. Turn off your cell phone, start a conversation. Listen, look into their eyes with simplicity and respect. If you don’t understand, ask. Don’t act like an invader, be hospitable; call someone, make an appointment…  friendship is not a luxury; it is the heart of life,  it is a shared melody. They sold us independence as freedom and self-sufficiency as a virtue, but we know that freedom is realized in love and commitment. And this is dependence chosen from freedom.

The ego is a coffin no one wants to share. It’s not easy to share with someone who’s blocked. No one can grasp a hand clenched into a fist.

If you need to have everything under control, you’re probably not letting anyone in; friendship is risk, the risk of sharing one’s own vulnerability, acknowledged and embraced, in order to be able to embrace the vulnerability of others.

Wounds, to be shared, need friendship as a transmission belt; the rest is emotional marketing, not human connection. Friendship doesn’t survive without reciprocity. I can love without being reciprocated. Love is a personal choice. Friendship isn’t born without reciprocity. It’s a shared story that speaks of you better than any resume.

I would like to share some paragraphs from my book “The Self and Its Metaphors” that talk about friendship in case you feel like taking a look at it.

“Friendship makes us unique, and at the same time, one, without confusing us. And each friendship is unique. It makes us great by the sum of them, and dignifies us by respecting the singular being. From “I and you” emerges “with you and me,” and we continue to generate life together, bonds that make that relationship something with its own name, without absolute exclusions. The heart expands with giving. Friendship reveals to us what makes us unique to another, who sees it and gives themselves, in turn, without losing themselves, to share a part of life.”

“Friendship is the art of dialogue. It is openness and encounter. It is a situation of convergence and detachment toward a shared environment. Every friendship has the depth of each heart and never allows for confusion or exclusion; it is total and participatory. Dialogue is an expression of maturity, in closeness. Knowing how to listen and understand. Knowing how to forgive. (Only those we love to have the capacity to hurt.)”

“Dialogue is between two hearts, between two perspectives that cannot resist being imprisoned by an ideology, a race, or a social status. Dialogue is rooted in the equality we all share. An origin, a universal destiny, and a personal journey. Mistakes are part of the journey. One of its offerings is to teach us how to resume the journey with greater wisdom and greater understanding for those who walk beside us.”

I end with a poem by Manuel Altolaguirre

He was master of himself, master of nothing.

As it was not of God nor of men,

He was never a rider of whiteness,

No swimmer, no eagle.

It’s barren land, never the leafy ones

Greens agreed with joy,

Not even the black, anguishing plumage.

He was master of himself, master of nothing.

Summer has arrived…