It’s increasingly common to hear about couples who, after 30 or 40 years of living together, decide to separate. A phenomenon that, years ago, seemed unthinkable. What’s happening? According to Father Ángel Espinosa de los Monteros, who works directly in marriage counseling, they have encountered surprising cases: couples who, after 44 years of marriage, make the decision to divorce. A reality that leads us to reflect on priorities in marriage.

Often, work, business, or even dedication to children can relegate the couple to a secondary role. “The children leave, but the husband or wife remains,” notes Father Espinosa, emphasizing the importance of prioritizing the marital relationship above all others.

Divorces in the First Years of Marriage

No less worrying is the opposite phenomenon: couples who, after three or four years of marriage, decide to end their marriage. In many cases, they never even consolidate their family. What happens in these cases? A lack of preparation and an unrealistic vision of marriage seem to be determining factors. Father Espinosa emphasizes the importance of premarital courses, not only as a requirement for marriage, but as a true formation to understand the commitment one is making.

The priest criticizes the lack of serious preparation among some couples, who expect to receive marriage training in just a few minutes. “To be a doctor, years of study are required, but to get married, some think 20 minutes are enough,” he quips. The call is clear: take courtship and preparation for marriage seriously, as the consequences of making a mistake in this decision are devastating for the couple and their children.

A Commitment That Requires Constant Care

In both late and early divorces, a common denominator is perceived: a lack of care for the marital bond. Distractions, mutual neglect, and a lack of sincere and constant communication can erode even the longest-standing relationships. “Take care of your wife, take care of your husband. Infidelity, rudeness, lack of attention… it all adds up,” Espinosa insists.

Children grow up and start their own families, but the marital bond remains. It is a call to strengthen that bond every day, dedicating quality time, thoughtfulness, and genuine love, because in many cases, emotional distancing develops silently.

Preparation and Prayer: Pillars of Marriage

The message is clear: to build a strong and lasting marriage, good preparation and a shared life of prayer are essential. From the very beginning, young people must understand the seriousness of the commitment they are making, and parents can play a fundamental role in this preparation, demanding formation, prayer, and a deep understanding of what marriage means.

Making a mistake in choosing a car, a house, or a vacation destination has minor consequences. But making a mistake in choosing a partner leaves deep and painful scars. Therefore, Father Espinosa insists on the importance of taking the time to get to know the other person well, discern, and prepare appropriately.

Faced with this reality, the final message is a call to reflection: care for marriage as a precious treasure, prioritize the marital relationship over all other concerns, and dedicate time to knowing and loving one’s partner. Preparation and strengthening the bond are essential to avoid the painful phenomena of late and early divorces.

May this message serve to inspire married couples and young people who wish to marry, always remembering that, at the end of the road, the couple is the fundamental pillar that remains.